The Fashionable Shark: Poolwear

I am a fan of being different. I can't stand uniformity and it goes against the very core of my being as much as I hate the pathetic whining of Veruca Salt and her absolute desire for a Golden Ticket.

That being said, my eyes hone in on what is aesthetically pleasing.

And here's one that will make you the envy of all: the Speedo Next Corset Back.

How can you not like a Moulin Rouge-style swimsuit?

I'm not too crazy about the print however...

If you were to ask (and then again, you might not), I would love to see John Galliano do some of his Dior magic for this suit.

Can you imagine this suit with a print from his 10 years of Dior collection?

Being a fan of woodblock prints, I can imagine this piece on this suit, for example:

Sans the collar, this suit would look pretty damn hot.

Men's suits are incredibly boring, in comparison. Granted, I'm not sure if I like this kind of swirly print on a long legged jammer for men but there has to be something more creative than just black shorts.

I understand that perhaps the regular male breeder does not like anything remotely ostentatious. I understand that perhaps rhinestones and feathers are not their thing. I understand all that. But can someone explain to me the fashionable aspect of jammers like these? And these are from Speedo's 2010 collection!

I am quite at a loss....

And several other brands have picked up the trend. The Orca CL-R Square Leg, for example:

I really do not understand....

So I implore the Couture Fairy to grant those efficient, performance-minded designers a little insight to the beauty of a garment, even if it is to sweat and get dirty in. I am a staunch believer that if you got it, flaunt it.

And believe me, tri-fit bodies have definitely got it. Why not look good?

I'm all for a retro-Tron look. Let me just get my belly in order and we'll talk....

As Mad As A Hatter Part 3: What's On a Runner's Noodle

As far as I've seen, most triathletes are wearing pretty standard issue when it comes to the run. I always settle for a light colored cap so as not to roast in the early morning/afternoon sun, especially here in Cancun. Your run cap can come in all colors and sizes so I thought taking a look at what the pros are wearing is a better choice.

Take Craig Alexander. Here is the winner of the Kona Ironman 2009 from the land down under, modeling a very innovative MP3 version of the visor headband by Headsweat.

Before I could ever dream of becoming a triathlete, I remember perusing issues of Triathlete Magazine, back in the day, and seeing this very blonde woman gracing the front cover. Her name is Michellie Jones, Aussie Ironman competitor and champion. When I did my first 70.3 here in Cancun, it turned out that she was also competing. Imagine my shock when I saw this woman, who I had seen on so many covers and in so many ads over the years, famous in the triathlon world, suddenly show up in a competition you were doing. It's the equivalent of seeing Jason Priestly all those years on 90210 and then running into him at the supermarket.

In that particular event, she was matching very nicely in a black, green and pink ensemble that matched everything. And I mean everything. Her clothes matched her hat, matched her helmet, matched her bike, matched every accessory on her bike.

Like I said, during that one 70.3 I did, I wore a white cap and lots of water. Yep. Water. Gave myself a bath at every aid station. If a breeze wasn't going to cool me off, ice cold water drenching you and running down your head and back on a hot day is the most delicious feeling in the world.

There is really, absolutely, no comparison.

So go with what you feel most comfortable.

And a little water never hurt anybody.

Mad As A Hatter Part 2: The Dapper Cyclist's Topper

One of the many things that catches the wandering eye of a spectator at a triathlon can be a bike helmet. My first mountain bike helmet was a Bell Sweep XC in ice blue. I loved how I looked like Goku from the Japanese anime "Dragonball Z", with the spiky points and all. It was an excellent helmet...until I crashed into a natty tree branch that caught me straight across the forehead. I did not see said branch because I was too busy trying to keep vertical, watching for jutting tree roots. Even with the crash, the only major thing that the helmet suffered was that the chin strap pulled hard and cracked the styrofoam.

I had to retire my poor helmet.

So I bought myself a nice Giro Atmos, a rather reliable helmet and nice looking (though I did prefer my Bell....).

The helmets that get the most attention, however, are the time trial helmets. Those helmets that look like something that could be out of Aliens Revisited, they are elongated and have a bit of a tail so that the rider can cut through the air. Obviously, you'd have to be a pretty good rider to really see the difference in times but you can't help but think they do kind of look sweet.

The biker ain't half bad, either....

Case in point, the Giro that Armstrong wore.

And obviously, if you really want to look badass, there area a couple of options. There is this new Rudy Project Wingspan Time Trial Helmet that's quite fetching.

You may also want to consider the Giro Advantage 2, especially with this check detail in the back. It offsets the norm in the sports world of using stripes or bolds. Save for soccer jerseys that look like the chuck wagon and those colorful downhill skiing jumpsuits, I believe the biking world is seeing something unprecedented. You have to love Italian design. 

The final decision, as always, is yours. Not looking good this season is unfathomable. Next post: your run choices.

As Mad As A Hatter

As I have mentioned before, I am a hat fiend. I am a discriminating hat fiend, however, and can't wear just anything. First reason is because my head is large. For a woman, whose daintiness also comes from her frame and, ultimately, from the size of her head in relation to the rest of her body, I feel that I am also proportional but on a larger scale. My torso may be small but my extremities are unlikely for a person my height. My head, at 60 cm/23.5 inches in circumference, falls definitely into the large-extremities category.

I've decided that this post must be about the toppers we don in a triathlon, one for each event (in most cases).

 

We'll start in order.

Swim caps come in an array of colors and are usually one standard size for adults. I have long hair and what tends to happen in my case is that during training or competition, my cap starts to slowly slide back. I have ripped many a cap in competition (even my first 70.3 cap which are normally thinner, about as thin as aluminum foil) due to the fact that the cap is about ready to shoot off my head because of the tight bun of hair at the back of my scalp.

One recommendation was to wear two caps so that the sliding is reduced. That worked somewhat well but it wasn't until the good people at Speedo thought about us with long Rapunzel-like ringlets that salvation was found: the Speedo Long Hair Cap, a cap with a bit of a pocket integrated into the material for those awkward buns.

 

Sakes alive, I believe we have a winner.

There have been tons of innovations in terms of swim caps since Busby Berkeley but I still think that if I were a synchronized swimmer, I would at least invest in one of Speedo's Flower Caps, a cap that covers down past the ears and decorated with enough silicone flowers to make even a flower pot in a hospital waiting room jealous.

There is also a non-flower-adorned version which most of those who have put their flower-power days behind them would appreciate. This particular model comes in two sizes, medium and large. It covers the ears quite nicely and reduces drag in the water.

Next post: your choice in helmets.

A Hand to a Glove

I'm a hat girl. I love vintage hats and have a sizable collection, mostly from the 40s. They come in all shapes, sizes and colors.

I do not, however, own a pair of gloves to go with those fabulous hats.

I do own a pair for my biking needs.

Because I started out as a mountain biker, I grew on the tendency to wear full-finger gloves and of course, I looked for a pair that was aesthetically pleasing.

Hence the SixSixOne Comp Gloves, shown in a previous post. The problem with these gloves is that after about three months, the logo on the finger tips and on the back of the hand started falling off.

I still wear them but they now have holes in the finger tips.

Time for a new pair so I went looking again. I'm rather taken to SixSixOne when Thor caught my eye.

Thor is a motocross company and not a mountain biking one but the gloves continue in being pretty sweet.

Case in point: the Thor Core Gloves. Here is a pic:

The color combinations are very much in keeping with the types of outfits the motocross bikers wear. According to other reviews (for I have yet to get my pair), these are thinner than what is normally used.

Which would be ideal for roadies.

And a pair which would probably be too thick (but then again, do I care?) but has an incredible stylistic line to them are the 2009 Thor Static Gloves for Women.

The choices are many. I've never been truly conventional and thus never looking within the boundaries of one world to dress my own. These are my choices but I'm sure you'll agree, they ain't half bad.

Covering Your Mouth

The mouth.

Such beauty that comes from it. Such foulness that it begets. It is the doorway of our life's breath and nourishment of that same life.We would all be lost without it. In my very humble opinion, second behind the eyes, I consider it the second most alluring thing on the face.

And most definitely, it must be protected.

I mention this because I've noticed a certain trend in fashion concerning the mouth.

Back in 2001, a French film by the name of Le Pact des Loups (Brotherhood of the Wolf), starring Vicent Cassel came out. Cassel and co-star Mark Dacascos don overcoats that button up right past the nose.

'Interesting,' I thought. 'I would love one of those.'

Of course, no one stocked such an overcoat and so I had to give up on the idea of one.

Then Lady Gaga shows up on one of her album covers with a similar look:

And as if it fell from a tree of all the wishes I had ever made, my wish landed right in my lap.

For all triathletes, runners or cyclists who live in cold, slightly rainy weather, I found the most badass jacket for this 2010, incorporating my much searched for jacket collar:

The Nalini Palombo Winter Jacket

It covers right up to the nose and comes up right on the hairline, a built-in ski mask on a jacket and it comes in red, black and white.

The only problem with this jacket is that its unisex, making it a little difficult for us women to figure what size would fit us (this jacket goes from size S to XXXL).

Put that together with a pair of nice gloves and you're set!

The Body As A Billboard

Anyone who has watched professional sports can always see someone trying to make a buck through air time. You see brands flash by in a cacophony of color at events and there's always someone who is making the fashion statement of the day.

Usually it's the one with the bigger endorsement or has a lot of personality.

If I had to choose, I'd be in the latter category. And unless Nike starts to endorse people who rank top, from the bottom up, then I'll be in the "Personality" category for a while. 

What I noticed in the Ironman series is that people are all about their uniforms, their compression gear (2XU made a killing with their compression calf guards) and their tattoos. And why the hell not? Here are people who train to one day be able to swim 2.3 miles, bike 111 miles and run a full marathon at 26 miles. All in one day.

I'm just surprised that it's only a tattoo that they want, after all that. 

I long ago decided that I would not go the tattoo route, as much as I'd like to. I am blood type O+, making me a universal doner. I would much rather keep my blood clean in the likelihood that someone I know would need a length of colon or something.

My alternative then? I found just the perfect thing off of Chanel's Spring-Summer 2010 show: Les Trompe-L'oeil de Chanel. Chanel Body Art.

It's a series of temporary tattoos of iconic pieces of Chanel design and jewelry, everything from cherry blossom branches to the double "C" logo.   

Yes, I would be looney enough to wear that in a triathlon. The only place I could imagine wearing it, though, would be on the wrist. On the legs, like these models, though nice, can never be seen under the tri shorts one would wear. 

Chanel Body Art on one wrist, my Polar on the other! 

Personally, I've always been a fan of doing the most peculiar and if I had the money sitting around somewhere, I might consider the Oakley Medusa, a scary kind of bondage cap plus goggles. The dreds on that plus my already long hair and I think we've got ourselves the winner of this year's Miss Congeniality Contest. 

I think I need a pair of leather opera gloves, like the model. 

That, paired with the Cervelo Test Team jersey and I think we have the best dressed person at any triathlon!

 

I wonder if you can get the dreds on the Medusa through the holes in a bike helmet...

The Brand Cat

I am a discerning brand cat.

'Brand cat?' you may ask. 'What on God's green earth is that?'

I was hanging out with Amy one day, in her apartment in downtown Mexico City. She had two cats at the time, Sarai and Tita. Sarai was probably the most intelligent cat I've ever come across in my life. With her front paw, she would swipe a paw-full of dry cat food and throw it into the water dish, eat her fill and leave the water dish an unappetizing murky brown. She only ate certain foods and was enamored with wet cat food but only a certain kind. If it wasn't Whiskas, she wouldn't eat it. Hence "Brand Cat" was born.

I'm a brand cat as well, but I have to admit, I'm picky. I like certain brands but more than anything, they have to adhere to my aesthetic and my sense of the product's image. For instance, I would not buy Prada running shoes, as much as I like their sunglasses and purses, for the same reason I would not buy a Nike cocktail dress (if they did make them), for as street sassy as their tops may be.

Go with what you do best.

I do agree with a tasteful combination.

Here's an example:

You've just finished a sprint and you pick up your bag of personal items (where you usually put your lubricant to protect from the salt burn against your skin while you swim, your protein bars, your hydration, etc...). Cancun (where I presently live) is usually not cold enough to pack a long-sleeved jacket. Get a baggy sleeveless t-shirt or a tank top to throw on. Sleeveless because your arms and legs will still have your bib numbers on them and you don't want to dirty your clothes too much. Get a nice sarong or a wrap to complement your shirt and tie it on like a mini skirt. Or use a thick canvas belt instead. Put on your cap or a nice bandana together with your shades and you’re good to go to the awards ceremony.

Whatever you decide on, the key points are:

1. Something made out of cotton or some easily washable material.
2. Baggy. Putting on something form-fitting after an athletic event where your body is swollen is probably not the most appropriate.
3. Sunglasses.

Years ago, I remember going back home to San Francisco after years of not going and was surprised to see young high schooler Asian girls, plain-looking and unkempt. Baggy clothing and thick, bulky jackets. I was saddened, to tell the truth. I knew that deep down, those girls had something attractive but they blocked it all off. I should know; I was one of them. 

This is not about buying just a brand. You can buy anything you like. I just believe that every woman has something within her that is worth seeing but only if she herself wants to see it too. 

Leather Pants vs. Tri Wetsuit

On a whim, I just bought a triathlon wetsuit, dirt cheap, off of eBay.

I live in Cancun so the likelihood of me using a wetsuit here would be unlikely. But seeing as that triathlons are a part of my life now, I can see myself doing one in a colder city. 

Hence, a very good purchase. 

Like a little kid on Christmas Day, I took my box into my room and proceed to put out the suit. 

The box is literally a pizza box with the very cool logo of 2XU (my wetsuit's manufacturer) on the front. I was skeptical that the suit would fit in the box and dreaded that there was no way I could have bought a $300 USD suit for $50 and worried that the box would arrive with only a photo of my wetsuit, nothing more. 

There was a photo on my invoice as well as the product. I pulled it out and looked at it.

"My," I thought. "It's rather long."

There's nothing to it, I thought. I stood and pushed my left foot through the pant sleeve. 

The next 20 minutes can only be described as me being stupidly tortured. As I pulled my leg through, I realized that wetsuits do not function like normal pants. They do not slide up and they got stuck...around my calf. A new one for me seeing as that I have a rather large ass and in my case, the pants that do not fit me normally do not make it past my thighs and hips and not my calves! I carefully pulled at the neoprene, hoping that I don't tear them on the first day of having them. I tugged, pulled, smoothed and did it all over again. 

By now, I felt hot and I did not know if it was from the actual heat of the evening or if this tugging and pulling business was making me break out into a sweat. All the while, trying to beat down the encroaching thought that I did not know how to put on a wetsuit.

Never in my life had I had such problems trying to put on an article of clothing. 

By the time I got it to my waist, the pant legs were no where near well fitted and my crotch reached as far as three inches away from it was supposed to be. Gingerly, I pulled the suit front up to me and slid my arms through. 

I was thankful that I didn't buy a sleeved version. 

After more pulling and tugging, I was able to pull the zipper up my back. I felt like I had just run a 400 meter sprint, there was so much exertion involved.

I stepped in front of the mirror. My crotch was still not aligned with my torso, giving me a bagginess that was reminiscent of my diaper days. My ankles and left knee were still a little bunched up and tight from just the sheer impossibility of pulling the suit further up my leg. 

From the waist up, however, I didn't look too bad. 

I looked almost badass.

Pulling off the suit was nearly as hard as getting it on. I took care not to fall on my head as I pulled. By the time it was off, my wetsuit was completely drenched in sweat. 

I'm definitely going to need more practice. 

Maybe I'll go out and buy something easier to practice with, like patent leather pants.

The Roots

I am a triathlete. Not a very good one but my goal is to become better. Among my many hobbies and interests, I love fashion.

I can blame my father, who used to be a travel agent. Long ago, when the word "Milano" just meant another trip to Italy, I remember my father at the tailor's, looking for a dress suit to wear and getting fitted into one, opting to getting them made instead of buying them in the States. American men were bigger in frame next to my father's thin, sinewy body type. American clothes never fit him.

I read this now and think how arrogant this sounds. How let-me-take-the-jet-for-a-Paris-shopping-spree-weekend it sounds.

But it wasn't.

I just saw it all as that trip to Europe to run around museums and eat good food. Little did I know that other kids did not spend their Sundays eating Italian headcheese, German baloney and prosciutto with bread sticks and baguettes, washed down with bottles of Perrier. That I was very much in a world of my own.

Growing up in San Francisco, I wasn't from a well-off family but books were always a part of my life, where fashion was not. My father had strict control of the reins in terms of what his daughter was to wear so it wasn't until I hit college, for the first time out of the house, that my personality was allowed to take on its true form and all my forms of expression followed likewise.

One of which was my personal fashion sense.

I owe much of my fashion awakening to a good friend, Amy. Having done photography as a major in art school was no small feat, seeing as that EVERYONE always tried to one up the other, in terms of the most artistically liberal. In Amy’s case, that meant wearing to class a tight, mermaid-type dress from the 60s, so tight it was difficult to walk, coupled with a pair of very tall platforms and topped (literally) with a wig that was a one-foot tall beehive. I was only always fascinated with hats (direct result of having watched “The Untouchables” as a child) but Amy brought vintage women’s hats into my life.

And where there was a hat, there had to be an outfit. Slowly, the fashionista in me wandered out and I saw that fashion was more than just very expensive clothing. It is dressing yourself in what is most aesthetically pleasing to your particular frame.

In the world of triathlons, most have a very nice looking frame. And to boot, there are clothes to accentuate that.

So the helmet has to match the outfit, which has to match the gloves, which all in the end, have to match the bike itself.


I had found my home and my goal in life: to bring a little spice in variety and show the triathlon community that a pair of Oakley Jawbones would look good with Love & Friendship Mac Nail Lacquer.

I have spoken: hear me roar.